I went to school in Colorado from 2017 to 2019. When deciding where to go to school for my Master’s, I sat at the kitchen bar in my childhood home and my step-dad (Kent) asked “If you could live anywhere, where would you live?” I remember hearing about Colorado Christian University on K-Love Radio, so Colorado was somewhat on my radar. I responded with “Colorado, because it has mountains, hiking, and sunshine.” He then shared how beautiful Colorado was and that because I was young I could live anywhere I wanted. We then planned a trip to Colorado to tour the school, and my heart was set.
Somewhat suddenly in 2019, after two-and-a-half years in Colorado I moved from Colorado back to Florida and before my move, Kent and I planned to climb a 14er. Kent researched 14ers and said “We can take the easier route or the difficult route” and then explained how the difficult route would be more fun but would require training. Which leads to Mt. Huron.
We trained for about five months and then set out for the hike. I had a lot of mixed emotions about returning to Colorado. Planning a trip back pretty soon since I moved back to Florida felt a little jarring. However, looking back, I believe God knew that this would be the very thing my heart needed. Instead of avoiding Colorado and some painful memories, I believe He invited my heart to reconcile and connect with it. In this time of my life training for a 14er in the state I just moved away from and that I felt a lot of raw emotions towards what was the perfect thing for my heart, body, and mind.
After landing in Denver, we drove out to Brekenridge, CO and next day we drove out to Leadville, CO to the trailhead. We wanted to drive to the trailhead the day before our hike while it was still daylight so we could see what we would be driving in the morning (at 4am while dark). When we got to a certain point in the drive, we soon realized that our car could not make it far enough due to it not having four-wheel drive. This led to later adding four extra miles onto our already eight mile hike. The hike can be mentally and physically exhausting, and at the end of the hike after you pass the “start of the trailhead” sign it can become a challenge to keep walking towards the car.
The night before we set out, we made peanut butter and jelly sandwiches to save for “when we got past the tree-line and into the valley;" and when you do get past the tree-line, the beauty does not disappoint. Past the tree line, you first see how high up you have climbed.
Then, walking a little further you get to the valley. This will forever be one of my favorite valleys due to the memories and moments that come with it. This is also the first time during the hike that you can see the peak. A lot of hikers stop to eat here before their “final push” or on their way down stop to take a moment and look at what they just hiked. The valley feels special as well because you had to work to get there. It’s hidden- in a way, and only those who put in the work get to see it.
The first year in the valley, while enjoying our PB&J’s Kent and I got hit by an unexpected hail storm, and after climbing for another hour, we could no longer see the top of the mountain due to the wind and hail. When we got to a resting point before the final push, we were met by two hikers with oxygen cans (like this one lol), that said it was too dangerous to complete the hike. We sat for about fifteen minutes contemplating what to do and decided to make our way down- completely bummed. We were about 40 minutes away from completing the 6.5-hour hike.
There’s a thump that happens in your heart when you do not complete a climb, there was a lot of training and planning that takes place. However, on the way down, Kent said “We’re going to come back next year- we have to make it to the top.” Nonetheless, after we completed our first hike, we were still so proud of ourselves for completing what we did (not to mention hiking the four extra miles to the car), for training well, and also for climbing through the hail and wind. We also knew that we had to do this again. Which led to climbing Mt. Huron for a second time in 2020 six months after COVID-19.
This time, we 1: rented a jeep - a dream car of mine and also great when driving through the “four-wheel drive only” trek to the trailhead and 2: researched which weeks were best to climb of which we found one of those weeks to be in August. Many lessons I have learned through hiking- and one lesson is that there is beauty in trying again, and part of that beauty is that there are lessons that can make you even stronger the next time. After the valley, we made our way up to the spot where we were told to turn around the previous year and took a moment there almost as a special spot of remembrance.
What I didn’t know the second time around was what took place after that marker. Which meant scrambling of which you may hear some cuss words in this next video (lol).
The struggle to the top of the mountain makes the view and significance of which you pushed yourself that more beautiful.
This time, on our way down- we were not sure which hike we would do next. Which leads to the third hike up Mount Huron four years later in 2024.
When I met Ryan, I often talked about the experience of hiking up Mt. Huron. I also met Ryan one month after 2020's hike, and a part of me really wanted Ryan to have his own experience climbing a 14er and because of how special Mt. Huron was to my heart and the beauty that it entails- there was no other 14er that I could think of to invite Ryan into. After four years together and repeatedly saying "we need to climb a 14er together," We finally decided to sit down with Kent and commit to a date. So, nine months before our hike we committed to a date and started training.
Ry set up a training plan for himself which involved wearing a backpack with a dumb bell and walking on an incline and using the stair-stepper and often invited me into it. A benefit of planning a hike, is that it can offer anticipation of achieving a goal- a goal where you cannot achieve it unless you train which can also keep you personally motivated to work out. In a way, it gives me a why to remaining disciplined (of which I personally need).
So, we set out the last week of August, 2024. And just four years ago in 2020, I was single, getting my Master's, and had no clue who God would introduce me to. A midwest guy from Illinois and a girl From Florida found each other. This hike felt like a full-circle moment for me, and often led me to reflecting on who I was four years ago to who I have become today. There is something so special that happens when you introduce someone to places you once visited. You get to reflect on how far you have come and also share the beauty and see new things through the other person's perspective. Some of my favorite moments from previous hikes were: seeing Colorado's beautiful landscape outside of Denver, driving to the trailhead through the 4-wheel-drive road, starting the hike early in the morning and feeling anticipation for what's to come, the what feels like "untouched" views, getting to the top, and then celebrating with a large pizza.
However, a moment that stands out to me from our most recent climb was during the scrambling section of the hike. The first time around, I scrambled and there was frustration but I experienced little fear. This time however was different- I was feeling fear which led to moments where I often did not want to continue going. There were moments when loose rocks would just completely psych me out and I would sit down not wanting to move. There was one moment in particular when I sat and broke down crying, then told Ryan "I've already done this once, I think I'm going to stay here and wait for you guys to come down, maybe I'll start walking down towards the car" (which is pretty crazy because the car was about 3 hours of walking), of which my body due to fear, cold, and the altitude began to shiver. Ryan then kneeled down in front of me and said "I think you are psyching yourself out climbing on all fours because it makes you feel like you are going to fall, try and use a hiking stick. I will be behind you the whole way. So if you fall, I'll be right here. Just take it slow and easy." He then explained the most efficient way to use the hiking stick for extra balance support. Another special part about this moment is that throughout this part of the hike, Kent would go on a few feet ahead of us, sit down on a rock, and explain the best path ahead- reassuring us that it was safe. I had my stepdad leading the way and guiding us towards to the top, and then my husband coaching me through moments of fear.
At one point, Kent disappeared leaving Ry and I and hiked to the top. The moment I was struggling the most and when I wanted to give up is when he began to climb. I thought that was weird timing, and then he later shared that he "wanted to give Ryan and I that moment." After he disappeared to the top a hiker ahead of us said "you only have 300 feet left" and it was the final thing that invited me to stand. I stood up, Ry grabbed me my hiking sticks, and if a loose rock fell on the way up, he would place his hand out and say "I've got you." My mantra to the final push was "slow and
steady. One foot in front of the other."
Each season of climbing Mount Huron has been through different seasons of my life. Hike one was when I just moved and was experiencing a lot of hard emotions. Hike two was six months during COVID; Hike two was also climbed a month and a half before meeting Ryan. And Hike three (four years later) was with my husband and stepdad. Mt. Huron has offered my heart lessons that only this place could teach me.
There was a moment on our way down after completing our push to the top where we were overlooking the valley enjoying PB&J’s, beef jerky, and protein bars- and when I looked at both Ryan and Kent I realized this might be the third and potentially final time hiking Mt. Huron. My heart was filled with gratitude, contentment, sadness, and also anticipation.
Gratitude: For a kind and wise stepdad that Jesus blessed me with starting at the age of ten; and also gratitude for a husband who is also my best friend and encourager.
Contentment: For three really significant, beautiful, and great hiking experiences.
Sadness: For though God offers new seasons, adventures, and with that new goodness to come, that also means saying thank you and "tying a bow" on certain places (or mountains) experienced.
Anticipation: For the new seasons, new beauty, new adventures, and potentially new climbs to come.
Go in courage dear reader. Courage to set a goal with people you love. Courage to adventure, to seek beauty, and places you have not yet visited. May you find new ways your heart comes alive, and may one of those ways be through discovering beauty that you have to work for to reach. "You don't know until you try," as my stepdad and dad have always reminded me. Give these songs below a listen, and may you begin to set goals and dream of new adventures. But don't do it alone- trust me, climbing a mountain and reaching a goal is so much better experienced with people you enjoy.
|Songs: Pictures of Mountains: Cody Fry, Never Give up Soul (Epic Instrumental): Fearless Motivational Instrumentals, Rocky Mountain High: John Denver, So Will I (100 Billion X): Hillsong Worship
With Courage,
Maddy V. Hesslau
